I am having suicidal thoughts.

I know someone having suicidal thoughts.

Contemplating Suicide

If you’re grieving or contemplating suicide, there are options available to help you. Call the Lifeline at any time to speak to someone and get support. For confidential support available 24/7 for everyone in the United States, call 1-800-273-8255.

You can help yourself.

Healing, hope and help can happen. Here are some ways to help you get through a crisis.

1. Find a Therapist/Support Group
Speak to someone! This can be meeting with a counselor or attending a support group. Here at Real Life church, our care department has several support groups such as Celebrate Recovery and Grief Share. These groups will provide the tools you need to get through this difficult time.

2. Build a support network
Don’t deal with this on your own. Those you turn to can provide encouragement and help.

Your Circle – You matter and can start to feel less isolated when you get in community with others. Consider volunteering, taking a class or maybe even starting a hobby.

Social Networks – Connecting to people through technology is a good way to remind yourself that you are not alone. Find groups of others that share similar interests. You will be able to share how you are feeling and hear stories of others who maybe feeling like you.

Community – Whether your community is at work, school, or Real Life Church, having a group of people who encourage help-seeking and support is one of the most important aspects of suicide prevention.

People you trust – Relationships built upon trust and companionship are protective factors that shield behavior and suicidal thoughts. Find people in your life that you can always confide in, feel safe around, and contact at any time.

3. Use your support network
Your support network can help you cope during difficult times. You lean on your support system by:

Express yourself – It is natural to isolate and shutdown but this makes using support difficult. Reach out to people you trust who have the ability to be sympathetic and non-judgmental.

Keep an open mind – Keep in mind that the advice and support of others come from a good place. We may not necessarily agree with advice we’re given, but staying open-minded and receptive to outside perspectives and opinions can help strengthen your support network.

4. Make a safety plan
A safety plan is designed to guide you through a crisis. As you continue through the steps, you can get help and feel safer. Keep your plan easily accessible in case you have thoughts of hurting yourself.

5. Get more information
Find out what resource are available and take advantage of them. You are not alone.

13 Reasons Why Life Is Worth Living

1. You are not alone. Even though I walk through the darkest valley, I will fear no evil, for you are with me. Your rod and your staff, they comfort me.” (Psalm 23:4)

2. You have value. You are a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that you may declare the praises of him who called you out of darkness into his wonderful light.” “Don’t be afraid. You are worth more than many sparrows.” (1 Peter 2:9; Matthew 10:31)

3. God cares about your tears. “God will wipe away every tear from their eyes; there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, nor crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.” (Revelation 21:4)

4. You can find help. “God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.” “We do not have a High Priest who cannot sympathize with our weaknesses, but was in all points tempted as we are, yet without sin. Let us therefore come boldly to the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy and find grace to help in time of need.” (Psalm 46:1; Hebrews 4:15-16)

5. Your life has purpose. “I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” (Jeremiah 29:11)

6. What you are going through is temporary. “Do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day. For this light momentary affliction is preparing for us an eternal weight of glory beyond all comparison, as we look not to the things that are seen but to the things that are unseen. For the things that are seen are transient, but the things that are unseen are eternal.” (2 Corinthians 4:16-18)

7. There is a good way forward, even when life is hard. “No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.” (1 Corinthians 10:13)

8. You are more than your outward appearance. “The Lord does not look at the things people look at. People look at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7)

9. You cannot imagine what good lies in store for you. “No eye has seen, nor ear heard, nor have entered into the heart of man—the things which God has prepared for those who love him.” (1 Corinthians 2:9)

10. You will not always feel this way. “We are hard-pressed on every side, yet not crushed; we are perplexed, but not in despair; persecuted, but not forsaken; struck down, but not destroyed.” “For his anger lasts only a moment, but his favor lasts a lifetime; weeping may stay for the night, but rejoicing comes in the morning.” (2 Corinthians 4:8-9; Psalm 30:5)

11. You are greatly loved. “I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with unfailing kindness.” “How wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ.” (Jeremiah 31:3; Ephesians 3:18)

12. You will not be put to shame. “Do not be afraid; you will not be put to shame. Do not fear disgrace; you will not be humiliated. You will forget the shame of your youth and remember no more the reproach of your widowhood.”“Let your conduct be without covetousness; be content with such things as you have. For he himself has said, ‘I will never leave you nor forsake you.’ So we may boldly say: ‘The LORD is my helper; I will not fear. What can man do to me?’” (Isaiah 54:4; Hebrews 13:5-6)

13. God is up to good in your life. “You intended to harm me, but God intended it for good to accomplish what is now being done, the saving of many lives.” “We know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose.” (Genesis 50:20; Romans 8:28)

This list was generated from the original blog post 13 Reasons Why… by Julie Lowe.

Tips for Helping Someone Who May Be Contemplating Suicide

Take all plans and threats seriously.

If someone contacts you and talks about wanting to end their life, you can assess the situation by asking the following three questions:

  • Question 1: Are you having thoughts about suicide?
  • Question 2: Do you have a plan? (drug overdose, shooting self with a gun, hanging, etc)
  • Question 3: Do you have access to the …. (pills, gun, rope, etc)

Have a calm and soft-spoken voice. Speak confidently, but with authority. Take charge without being bossy. They are looking to be rescued and they need to be. Be sure not to challenge them by disagreeing with what they say. Stay in prayer for the situation.

Show care, concern but most of all acceptance of them.

Affirm to the individual there is hope. Reassure this person of God’s love even in this situation.

Convey that help is available and this person’s concerns will be listened to. Use the word “help” often.

Ask for a promise: Can you promise me that you will call (counselor, parent, pastor, etc) before you do anything to hurt yourself.

Immediately call 911 when a person is a danger to him- or herself or others. 

Do’s and Dont’s

Do take your time with the person and tell the person you care and God cares. (Isaiah 41:10; 1 Peter 5:7)

Affirm them verbally. Tell them they did the right thing by coming to you for help. Affirm there are right decisions. It is important for them to know they can make good decisions.

  • “You did the right thing by calling”
  • “I am glad you came by”

Do remind the individual that God has a purpose for his or her life. (Jeremiah 29:11; Isaiah 43:18–19)

Do acknowledge the individual’s feelings and let this person know that he or she is not alone. (Psalm 46:1; Deuteronomy 31:8)

Don’t be judgmental or respond in shock about what he or she is expressing, they already feel enough guilt. Telling them they are being selfish is not the right thing to say. (Proverbs 3:5–8)

Do not be afraid to talk about it openly.

Don’t get sidetracked with the person’s questions. (Psalm 119:105)

Don’t be afraid to talk about the aftermath of suicide.

Don’t try to fix this person’s problems or answer his or her questions. Come alongside this individual and guide him or her to the help that is needed. (Matthew 26:38; Philippians 4:13)

Do not promise you will not tell anyone about their situation. There are laws forbidding you from doing this.